If you’re visiting friends and family this year perhaps you are taking a furry friend along with you.  Holiday visits can be great but are often busy and demanding.  Remember, common sense and simple courtesies can reduce stress for everyone, critters included.

•  Indoor
  • Bring your own supplies (portable dishes for food and water, blankets, and towels, comfort items, etc.)
  • Respect household routines and needs (your dog may like an hour of playtime at 6 a.m., but maybe your hosts sleep in, so try to find an adaptation)
  • Share the rules: make sure to explain any special needs prior to your visit
  • Plan ahead for any unexpected clean up (paper towels, cleaning supplies)
• Outdoors
  • Fenced yards?  If not, pack warm gear for longer walks.
  • Plan ahead for anticipated clean up needs (lots of disposable bags)

Your cat friends may disagree with the adage, “Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days” (attributed to Ben Franklin). But there’s something wise embedded in that humorous observation.  

The Hidden Value of a Guest’s Perspective: When staying as a guest in someone’s home, one often becomes acutely aware of the pre-existing patterns of the household and exercise respectful consideration of other people’s needs, replacing entitlement with effort.  Guests pitch in, offer to help, and basically behave with other people in mind.

“through everyday actions, we reweave the web of life.” ~Vandana Shiva (environmentalist scholar, activist, and founder of Navdanya)

Beyond elaborate theories about what it means to do and be good, perhaps there is broader lesson in the example of hosts and guests.  Whether considering the outcomes and consequences of actions or the implied duties and responsibilities, hosts and guests are in a dynamic relationship.  Mutually supportive, continuous effort is embedded in the logic of hospitality, which suggests genuine caring.  Hosts invite and welcome, while guests (thoughtful ones, anyway) are considerate and grateful.  Each remains concerned about and conscientious of the impact of their actions.  In a harmonious relationship, gratitude and cooperation replace entitlement.  In short, as guests, we are often on our best behavior.

What would it be like if we expected that level of attention every day?  What if we extended that compassionate concern beyond our hosts and immediate spheres of friends and family and learned to practice empathy without exception?

Maybe the short days and the winter holidays get folks to consider life on the pale blue dot.  Whatever the reasons, “resolution season” engages many people in a time of personal reflection.  If you wonder what might change, just ask yourself, what might I do differently if I considered myself a guest on the planet?  Attempting to act with a genuine interest in putting others’ interests ahead of our own may seem impossible, especially considering how many “invisible others” there are who may not fall within circles of recognized concern (like animals).  But it is not impossible to try.